Message From My Little Girly Nanuk on her Birthday

Eleventh July (1996) is considered the day my little girly was born, and we have celebrated this date each year with cake, and much love and fuss. This year, of course, my girly is not physically with us and I have been conscious of the date but thankfully I have not felt terrible distress at her physical absence. I lit a candle for her and burnt some incense in the morning.

It is a warm sunny day today, and has been a quiet day of reflection and regrouping in general. Whilst I am aware that this would have been her 13th birthday, my spirits are calm and somewhat buoyant, even though in the morning I was again thinking how the energy in my home has changed since 10 December 2008 when she went across.

I have a paper calendar, more like a year planner, flat on the side of my desk, showing June to November 2009. The original sleeper couch on which I was sitting when she was given to me on 17 August 1996 is still in my office, the place where she was given to me all those years ago with a blue ribbon loosely tied around her neck.

Today, 11 July 2009, at 13h35, a bird (that I think is a Prinia) came strolling into my house, from the lounge, down the passage and went into the office. I gave it a bit of time to find its way out again but it didn't do so - it flew from one side of the office to the other, from the sleeper couch to my desk chair, but did not appear distressed, just wondering perhaps where it was and how to get out of there.

I slowly went into the office and pulled back the curtains, and opened one of the windows very wide so it could fly out, but it went into the TV room instead, so I let it be.

A short while later I went to see where it was, and found it in the office again so I went and got some bird seed, and went into the garden to put some seed into the bird house just outside my office window in an attempt to lure it out. By the time I got to the bird house, the bird had found its way out, and was happily perched on the outside ledge of my office window and then flew very calmly to one of the tall bushes right next to the office window.

I came back inside and went to my office to see if I needed to clean anything or straighten out anything, following the visit, but the office was clean, untouched and orderly. Untouched that is except for two places:

My little visitor had left its mark on the calendar on my desk. And on which part of the calendar did it leave its mark? Would you believe, stradling 16 & 17 August - the hours before my little girly was given to me and the actual day she arrived.

And the second place it left its mark is right in front of the photograph of me with the two-legged love of my life who gave me Nanuk all those years ago.

Am I trying to find dots to connect? I don't think so. It would have been her birthday today. A bird chose this day to come into my home, and walk all the way to the office, and spend most of her visit in the office, no other room - the office is where she spent her first hour with us (me and the two-legged love of my life) the day she was given to me, and where she spent most of the rest of her days, keeping me company.

And it left its mark on the exact time frame in which Nanuk came into my life in 1996, and right in front of a photograph of the person who gave her to me. Nowhere else J

Wow.

BP
Saturday 11 July 2009
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